“Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense. You don’t have to compromise convictions to be compassionate.”
With the DOMA currently up in question with the Supreme Court we all have been bombarded with sweeping symbols taking over Facebook profile pictures. Lines seem to have become split and I have been asked by several people which "side" I'm on. I have never been one to jump on bandwagon's which I feel many have. It has become a status symbol of profile pictures lately. So where do I stand on the subject? I believe in the sanctity of marriage between and a man and a woman. There I said it! This is what I believe! Now before people jump down my throat I find it most important to say I believe this however it does not mean I hate or fear. People jump quickly to conclusions that if you're not with them you're against them which is far from the truth. I have many friends who consider themselves gay and it doesn't mean I don't love them or care about them. I do not have to agree with them in order to love them and vice versa. There are a million other topics in which I don't agree with however disagreement does not mean hate and certainly not any fear. I don't hate or fear, I just choose to kindly disagree with.
So what other things do I not agree with? Well since we are on that topic I feel strongly that children need two parents homes, a mother and a father. Not grandparents raising them, not day cares or schools raising them, and definitely not the state care system raising them. While I know for many this may not be a possibility because a partner has decided to leave or another reason, it doesn't mean I can't believe that two parents aren't the best for children and many studies would back me on that. I also feel children need one parent at home with them. Again I know with single parents this may not be a possibility however it does not mean I can't believe and know children need a parent at home with them during their first most formative years. I don't agree with parents who prefer two salaries to go on extravagant trips or live in large empty houses while they push their children off on others to raise. Again if that option in no way could be possible with two parents and both need to work to put food on the table then they have to do what they have to do to survive, yet I still know their children would benefit more from having one of them home to raise them. Also going off a similar context I don't think people should knowingly bring children into this world when they can't provide for even themselves. They are doing a major disservice to their children by breeding them when they are unable to feed them. Expecting the government services to be their child's baby daddy I just do not agree with. If you know you are a in a tight place then don't bring a child into that hard place as they and you will suffer from it as it only puts you in an even tighter place. Mistakes happen I know, I am saying this based on those that knowingly choose to have more children when they already have no resources to provide. In the case of unplanned pregnancies I am not against looking into adoption if you know that you will never be able to provide and give that child opportunities to be raised in a stable home. Everything is not black and white, however even the exceptions still does not mean I have to waiver in my own knowledge of what is best.
I don't agree with having children out of wedlock. Do I have very close friends that have? Yes I sure do! It doesn't mean I don't love them or I choose to shun them, it just means I don't agree with it. Many it was not by exact choice, but by a misjudgment on their parts. I agree things happen but in today's world there are countless ways to protect ones self from an unwanted pregnancy if they practice safe sex. Again does it mean I shake my finger at them for being irresponsible? Nope, if anything I embrace them knowing it will likely be a hard and far from ideal path for them and try to be a supportive and loving friend even if I don't agree with their actions. I also don't agree with those that choose to cohabitate before marriage with a boyfriend/girlfriend. I believe living as if married yet not getting married is not right. If you want to live as if you're married then get married. If you don't feel you are ready to marry that person then surely you are not ready to live with that person full time. If you can't devote yourself to that person with a marriage commitment then you are not committed enough to live with that person. Jumping boyfriend/girlfriend to boyfriend/girlfriend and jumping from living situation to living situation is not healthy. How about social aid such as welfare? Well I love that we have a system set up to help those who may be in need. I have personally been to places internationally and have seen the devastation of a place that does not have any system to help the poor. I believe there is nothing wrong to ask for help when you desperately need it, however I do not agree with those who abuse such systems. Those individuals who instead of the fathers who are involved paying for formula/food if the mothers can't take from the state when they do have the ability to provide. I don't agree with those that live off the system instead of only taking when they are at rock bottom with intentions of getting out of that rock and a hard place they have fallen into.
Then there is that major line drawing topic of abortion. I myself do not agree with abortions unless there is a medical necessity however like everything else I do not hate or pass judgment on others who are faced with such a decision. My biblical backgrounds states "It is not the will of your Father that one of these little ones should perish." (Matthew 18:14). I know there are many other options for them and that unborn child however, like everything else, it is their decision though it would never be my own decision and I can still feel that it is wrong. It does not mean I don't love them or don't have compassion for them or I can't consider them a close friend, however just because you are a friend does not mean I have to agree with you and vice versa.
Now on the opposite of abortion I know it is our obligation to care for orphans, those whose mothers chose life yet have no homes. Many individuals are so pro-life and will stand with signs outside of abortion clinics, however they themselves are not opening their home to a child who's mother chose life. We are religiously commanded to care and look after the widows and orphans in distress (James 1:27), be a father to the fatherless (Psalms 68:5-6 and Psalm 10:14), and defend the cause of the orphans (Deuteronomy 10:18). We are to be the hands of feet of the Lord who said "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." (John 14:18). We are not called but commanded to "welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me." (Matthew 18:5). We are to "Remember those…who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering." (Hebrews 13:3). We are to also "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves…defend the rights of the needy." (Proverbs 31:8,9) and "defend the cause of the poor and needy." (Jeremiah 22:16). This does not mean only here in the U.S. but also internationally as stated here, "Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, "Give them up!" and to the south, "Do not hold them back." Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth" (Isaiah 43:5-6). I could go on and on how we are not only called but each one of us who calls ourselves children of God are commanded to be His hands and feet as He put us here to do His work and care for orphans in their distress and welcome them into our homes. Perhaps this singularly is my biggest passion as I know while not all may be able to welcome an orphan into their home or adopt, however we each can donate and/or support and pray for those who are or programs that provide care for these needy children.
I am thankful I have that freedom to have my own stance on many subjects without being persecuted unlike other countries which do not experience the same freedom we take for granted. I put my trust in the Supreme court to make the best decision be it what I do or do not believe in. My hope is they vote not based on bandwagons or personal agenda's but on personal convictions. Their decision will not change what my beliefs and values are no matter what they choose.
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