The Rebecca Jeanne Routine: Finally Some Time to Update!

To say life has been hectic here would be a total understatement! With Brian still traveling for work out of town Mon-Thurs it's just me and the two littles. The past two weeks he has been gone through Friday so my partner in crime help has only been on the weekends leaving one busy mama during the week!

Halloween came quickly and flew by just as quickly. Of course N decided the day of that his bug costume was just not going to work so a last minute trip to the store and he became Superman! N as of Tuesday is now officially in our care as foster parents so we officially now have two kiddo's therefore our home is full so we will not be taking any more placements. Everything with their case is up in the air and going to court so we are taking it day by day unsure of what the future may be for the two.

It has been now 3 weeks that we have had N in respite with us and the adjustment has been short of miraculous. For being 14 months old we expected to have to really work on bonding and attachment. It was obvious from day one that he knew how to bond as he had several healthy significant relationships already built in his previous foster home which was assuring. Bonding and attachment are super heavy words in the foster care/adoption world that are not to be taken lightly. With multiples moves and trauma that comes from each move it is not unusual for children to regress and have trouble trusting and bonding including babies and toddlers.

With baby E we got her right out of the hospital and she bonded beautifully from day one. In honesty, it took me a few days to get over the shock and have the full mama instinct kick in. To go from getting a call to having a baby suddenly in your arms a few hours later is the most surreal thing. We did the feeding routine and loved on her and in a matter of a few days it became instinctual and gazing into those big blue eyes she truly captured my heart.

With N I expected him to have more of an adjustment to make but I am happily surprised to know he is crazy about his mama, poppy (or dada), and his new life! From the moment I met him he came right up to me ready to let me into his on the go world. What was to just be baby E and I going over to meet him suddenly became bringing home child #2 by the end of our meeting. Again so surreal but good we are go with the flow people that are use to sporadic changes.

N has fit in perfectly and has strongly attached to us. All the guards we expected him to have up have melted away or were never there. He was very loved by his foster grandma and it shows and has aided in his ability to attach to us. With his foster grandma she even said he had that grandmother love but was missing the maternal love which he has now. He comes to us seeking cuddles and comfort and has thrived with the stability in our home.

(Our daily life....baby E in the carrier and N flying around on his car!)

We had a semi-annual review for the kids on Monday so they had to go into a day care program at the social services building during our meeting. After when we went to pick them up N came running 100 miles an hour with his arms in the air huffing and puffing into my arms. For me it was one of those moments that I almost melted onto the floor in front of everyone. Those who saw it were all amazed and spoke happily to see how he has really bonded. It was one of those pivotal moments in my life that I will forever treasure because my heart stopped at that moment as I saw him genuinely running to me with so much joy and excitement showing how attached and loved he feels. Of all the other people there he ran past he came to me and when I picked him up he threw his arms around me and melted into a hug. I was on the verge of tears and while I felt that mothering instinct for him before it was that moment that sealed my heart as his mama. He is such a super happy easy going guy (as long as he gets his two naps a day!) and we are so blessed to have him with us.

I'm also keeping it real and will say going from 0 to 1 kid was an adjustment and I treasure the 4 weeks baby E and I had together. I know the time with just the two (and three when Brian's home) of us set up a perfect foundation for early bonding. Then going from 1 kid to 2 kids was another major change and adjustment. We are lucky both are pretty easy going kids, however being pregnant and running after a toddler and keeping up with a babies feeding schedule and care can leave this mama exhausted by the end of the day. I will admit I have shed my tears of stress and frustration but that's what two little kiddo's and pregnancy hormones mixed with every day life can do to you!

We also had an interesting past almost three weeks with N being on antibiotics for a nasty double ear infection he came with and a terrible runny nose leftover from a cold he was getting over. Ended up his 10 days of Amoxicillin wasn't enough so we had to step it up to a stronger 3 day antibiotic and again to keep it real lets just say the tissues, diapers, and wipies we went through was astounding! It was N's first time on any type of antibiotic and it really ran through his system and often led to multiple wardrobe changes and baths throughout the day. Oh the joy of parenthood we got flung into right away :)

(All three enjoying the heating duct)

N is finally over the cold and we go tomorrow for his follow up to make sure his ears are clear. He is such a ham and gives the biggest hugs. He almost always has a smile on his face and has that twinkle in his eyes. I have had it commented that both baby E and N look so much like Brian and I. Everywhere I go we hear that even from those that do not know they are our foster children. Even at the social services office I was told by three different unrelated workers that it is unbelievable how both kids could pass as our biological children which is interesting and not something we expected.

As for baby E she is now officially out of newborn clothes and into 0-3 month clothes as of today. Some of her newborn outfits she can still squeeze in but any with footies she is too long for :( At her last appointment on Halloween (where she got a vaccine shot and an oral vaccine) she was up to a healthy 10 lbs. 9 oz. and was 21 in. long. She is growing leaps and bounds and has great head control. She is finally on normal newborn nipples instead of the preemie nipples and she is filling out newborn diapers so likely can go to size 1 once we make it through the rest of her newborn ones.

(Using our curtain as a cover!)

As I said before and we are commonly asked by everyone what will be happening with the kids all we know right now is that we are loving them each and every day and praying for God's will to be revealed. We came into fostering intending on sending kids home to their parents or relatives. In our kids case the county is going to court for possible permanent custody shortly because N has been in the system for a while which will sever parental rights and lead to them needing a new permanent home. As we sit now after much discussion we would pursue adopting them if the possibility is there. Again we have no idea how their case will play out, they may end up going back to their birth mother or a relative, we honestly have no idea. Knowing that the county is currently pursuing permanent custody likely means they have enough of a case to take away parental rights but it will be up to the court system and then up to the county where they will be placed permanently if the case goes that direction. So when we are asked and shrug our shoulders and say we do not know we are being honest and upfront in the fact that indeed we have no idea. Your guess is as good as ours and all we can do is pray that the children's best interest is upheld.